Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I have a reading level above third grade

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Indiana Pacers assistant Lloyd Pierce taking lessons for next opportunity as head coach - Andscape

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

Astronomers simulate a star's final moments as it's swallowed by a black hole: 'Breaks like an egg' - Space

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

How do I build muscle easily with isometrics?

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

How do I rat my boss out for serial cheating on his wife?

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

Have you ever witnessed a remote beach show where hundreds of turtles crawling to the water?

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I actually pay taxes

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

Women's College World Series: Tennessee walks off UCLA in extras to survive controversial ruling - Yahoo Sports

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

What is every dictators biggest fear?

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

Why are European countries warning European travelers to be careful traveling to the United States?

I don’t cotton to rapists

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

Are you worried that the 2024 US presidential election will result in a close race?

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I don’t buy bullshit

Dakota Johnson shows Chris Martin what he's missing post-breakup in completely sheer ensemble - Page Six

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

How would you feel if your girlfriend had dick pics on her phone?

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I can read

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I see through liars

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I understand how hurricane paths work

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I have complete contempt for fakery

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I can count

I know who the president of Turkey really is